Care Conversations
(It’s much each easier to talk about these things before you have to.)
The big stuff. The practical stuff. The slightly awkward stuff. And the stuff you never think to ask until suddenly everyone is looking at each other like, “Wait, do YOU know?”
Our Care Convo Cards give you questions to get the important stuff out of everyone’s heads and into an actual conversation.
Because “We should probably talk about that sometime” can become “Ummm, Does anyone know what Mom actually wants?” pretty damn fast.
Care Conversations
(It’s much each easier to talk about these things before you have to.)
The big stuff. The practical stuff. The slightly awkward stuff. And the stuff you never think to ask until suddenly everyone is looking at each other like, “Wait, do YOU know?”
Our Care Convo Cards give you questions to get the important stuff out of everyone’s heads and into an actual conversation.
Because “We should probably talk about that sometime” can become “Ummm, Does anyone know what Mom actually wants?” pretty damn fast.
How this works:
Skip anything that doesn’t fit. Go wildly off topic. Pull another card. And caregivers, answer for yourself, too. Your wants matter here.
You do not need to solve everything in one conversation.
The goal is getting to know each a little better now, so there’s less guessing later.
Pick a card.
Ask the question.
See where it goes.
Ready to talk care?
Pick whatever feels relevant right now. We’ll pull the cards that fit.
Pick one or more:
The Practical Stuff
Medications. Doctors. Paperwork. Who knows what. Who’s doing what. And the backup plans Future You will be very glad exists.
The Big Stuff
Where you’d want to live. How you’d want to be cared for. Who you trust to make decisions. Basically: the things you really don’t want everyone guessing about later.
You, Me & Caregiving
How caregiving is changing things between you. What’s working. What’s not. What’s driving each other a tiny bit nuts. And what you don’t want to lose along the way.
Just for Fun
For when you need a break from the heavy stuff. Funny hypotheticals, inside jokes, and questions that are mostly here to break the ice.
No starred cards yet. Tap the star on any card to save it here.
Who's reading your eulogy if Morgan Freeman's busy?
Which TV doctor do you want on your case? Dr. McDreamy? Dr. House? Doc Martin? Dr. Quinn, Medicine Woman?
If someone made a movie about this whole caregiving situation, who would play us?
If you got to design your dream assisted-living community with one completely unreasonable amenity, what are you adding?
What’s one thing you’ve learned about me through caregiving that you really could have lived without knowing?
If our family had official caregiving job titles, what would everyone’s be?
If we made bingo cards for your next appointment, what square absolutely has to be on there?
If you ever had to downsize, what’s the one completely unreasonable thing you’re insisting comes with you?
What’s the caregiving story that was absolutely NOT funny at the time…but is pretty funny now?
If we had entrance music every time we walked into an appointment, what song are we choosing?
Which Friends character would you want most as your live-in caregiver?
If you ever need a walker, are we keeping it gray or bedazzling it?
What’s something about you that you don’t want to get lost in all this?
Do you ever worry you’re a burden?
What’s one thing I do that genuinely makes this easier for you?
What’s something we used to do together that we need to bring back?
What do we butt heads about most when it comes to your care?
What haven’t you told me because you didn’t want me to worry?
What decisions do you always want the final say on?
What do you wish I’d just do without you having to ask?
When does helping start to feel like hovering?
What’s keeping you up at night that I don’t know about?
What do I worry about way more than I need to?
What’s something I do for you that low-key drives you nuts?
What do you still want to do yourself, even if it takes forever?
What do you want to make sure gets passed down?
Is any of this actually written down—or is it all living in your head?
Funeral, memorial, or full-on party?
Burial, cremation, or something else entirely?
At the end, who do you want in the room?
If you had a say in where you spent your last days, where would it be?
If you probably weren’t going to get better, what would you want us to fight for?
When you say “quality of life,” what does that actually look like on a regular Tuesday?
Are there any treatments you already know are a hard yes—or a hard no?
When a treatment comes with tradeoffs, what matters most to you?
If driving ever becomes a concern, how are we handling it?
If we got worried home wasn’t safe anymore, how do you want us to bring it up?
If you ever moved, what would make a new place feel like home?
If you needed more help day to day, what’s the one thing that’s non-negotiable?
And if home stopped working altogether, what’s Plan B?
If living on your own got harder, what’s Plan A?
If you ended up in the hospital, who’s handling everything at home?
Who’s doing what around here—and is everyone pulling their weight?
If you needed care, how would we actually pay for it?
What bills would someone need to know about to keep the lights on?
What’s the one thing we keep saying we’ll get organized and…haven’t?
What are we white-knuckling right now that could be easier with a little help?
Is there anything you'd rather have a professional caregiver help with (instead of family)?
If I couldn’t be here, who’s your backup?
Who would you want getting updates from your doctor?
If someone needed to step in, would they know where to find the important stuff?
Who gets the first call if something happens? And the second?
If we landed in the ER tonight, what would I need to tell them?
Do you have a list of your doctors and their contact info?
Is your medication list written down anywhere we could grab it?
If you couldn’t handle your money for a while, who’s paying the bills and dealing with the bank?
If you couldn’t make your own medical decisions, who’s calling the shots?
Do you have a will—and is it somewhere other than “a drawer, I think”?
Caregiving comes with a million questions. (And not enough time.)
We’ve done the research so you don’t have to.
Caregiver Cheat Sheets
The stuff you wish someone handed you sooner. Simple guides to help you get organized, remember what matters, and feel a little less scattered.
Care Conversation Cards
Caregiving comes with conversations most of us avoid until we can’t. These questions help people talk about what matters: what they want, what you need, and how to keep going together.
Vetted Resources
Free, curated picks (that we actually trust) to help you find answers and get support faster.